My cousin just IM'd me.


Evelyn : Want to hear something lame?
Teh Shambo: oh please!
Evelyn : So
Evelyn : My automation software is Visual Test
Evelyn : Which is a 10-year-old, bastardized version of Basic.
Evelyn : And we are rolling out a new, slower version of our software soon.
Evelyn : So during my testing, because it's slower now, I kept having the really big buildings cause the testing software to fail.
Evelyn : Finally realized that it was because the screensaver was starting while the buildilng designed, and Visual Test is so picky and fragile that it was failing when it tried to access a menu afterward b/c the screensaver was the active program.
Evelyn : So I open a ticket to get access to my screensaver tab.
Evelyn : Turns out I can't; the settings are global.
Evelyn : The IS guy suggested that I tie the mouse to an oscillating fan with a zip tie.
Evelyn : I thought he was kidding ...
Evelyn : Then he brought me a fan.
Evelyn : ><

that is awesome

awesome!
Our computers have one gig of ram. It was an upgrade because VCNAs new cataloging and ordering software required one gig. So they went from a half gig to a full gig. I tried to explain that windows, ADP, and other software requires memory too but was rebuffed because nothing has a requirement of more than a gig so were fine with one until something requires two. I failed to get across the point so I tried the "if Tom has one whole apple and wants to give four of his friends a half of his apple how many friends wont be able to run their software and do their work" but no luck...
Also, my former boss thought an LCD screen was a touch screen and stabbed it with his pen once. Still have the monitor around here somewhere...

Years ago when I worked for GPC (parent company to Napa auto parts), We had a driver call in real early. He called in to tech support saying there was a message on the terminal to run the inventory reports and he did not know how. The tech worked with guy for 20 minutes. We had a program called double vision that allowed us to echo back what was on the screen and even take control of a screen if needed. The driver was getting pissed because no matter what that tech told him he did not see the prompts on the screen described to him. Finally the tech used the double vision program and saw that there was nothing on the screen but a sign in prompt. When he told the driver that he got all pissed and finally stated. "Look damn it there is a post it note on this damn screen asking me to run reports." ........ A fucking post it note? Really that was all you needed to say in the first place intead of stating it was on the screen.

20 minute call for a damn post it note.